#143

Its been a year since I seen your sweet face. You didnt see mines cus ya eyes was closed. I saw you lay in a bed not suitable for you. Beside it I cried many tears before I realized you've left such a place. Every day wasn't the same since THAT day. The day I watched the gray coffin goin underground. You may be 6 ft under surface, but you're 6 zillion stars above. Somewhere far impossible to see. Also somewhere far soon hoping to be. I cant see you but you can see me. When the sun rises you're here with me. When the sun sets you watch me sleep. 0ne night I hope to see your face. In a dream wish to start&never end. Your spirit I feel when I think of you. But sadness behind it because I just miss you. I still sit&think about that night. Why you chose to make a move that took your life. The days sure changes but the memories stays the same. Yet it would've been better if we just made more. 0fcourse, Eternity sounds forever. 0ne day I'll see you again. Maybe later but not soon. There are things that need to be done here. Im sure you're getting things done up there. Til the day comes, ill always think of you. Til the day comes, keep smilin down til I stand beside you. I love you pass Eternity, always have&always will. You will always be my J.Bub. My partner. My fatboy. My sillyboy. My sweetboy. The smile on my face. The sound of my laughter. The beat of my heart. Every steps I take. For now, I bid you goodnight. Sweet dreams& *Kisses to the sky. 

#Truth

a SMILE is the most beautiful curve on a woman's body

a BET to REMEMBER ! ;)

Here's the bet ;;

 $100 if Gbaby marries Johnay-Her current B(oy)F(friend)FE 

$100 if I get married BEF0RE her ! ;)

THIS IS G0ING T0 BE FUN <3

We talked over the phone&made a pinky promise over the phone. Lol. Yay ! ^.^

-Til then twin :)

An Understandin of your Visit :')

Continutation to my last post :) So you know how my twin dreamt of 'Bub' ? Before her dream I misplaced his shirt ? Well, thinking about it .. I went crazy lookin for his shirt for a whole week ! Every time I fail to find it I say his name under my breath w/ a "sorry" . When I sat down and actually thought about my twins dream .. I took in the fact that maybe 'Bub' came to forgive me&to tell me its okay that I couldn't find the shirt he gave me . I mean, my love for him is already enough :') As long as I hold him in my heart, a shirt is nothing but just another item . With an image of him in my heart its more priceless than a shirt from a store . We take nothing when we leave this world behind but our knowledge right ? With him in my mind daily , theres no problem :) Maybe if it wasn't for my twins dream I would still go crazy lookin for an item thats less important than a feeling . Hard'owt ;) Love you 'Bub'. R.i.L . Til we meet again . OneSweetDay <33

a Dream wish was REAL !

So my twin has been tellin me about her wierd (but funny) dreams thats been 'hauntin' her for weeks (Lol) .. &one that obviously stood out to me the most is her dream w/ 'Bub' :') 0MG ! I was speechless&ready to hear how it all went. It wasn't a long dream with him , but it was short enough to leave me curious. Heres a preview. So my twin was talkin to one of the young man at our stake, than all of a sudden 'Bub' came outta nowhere&asked for me ! Tears filled my twin's eyes til she saw me. She pointed me out to him&he saw me, but , she said right when I turned he disappeared :'( Dammit ! Why ? Twin said it was prolly time limit =/ But, Why did he ask for me ? Did he want to tell me something ? What did he need ? Gash, I wish her dream was real ! I really miss him, want to see his sweet face, &being able to be in his arms once more. Sometimes I still question why he had to leave, but I cannot question Heavenly Fathers plan. Hope one sweet night i'll see you 'Bub' :') LoveYou ! Always have&always will <333 til we meet again. . .xox

"A day w/out you is like a year w/out .. sunshine"

Grrrrr ! I can't find my B0B MARLEY shirt ! >.< It was given to me by my BFF/BUB who passed away last year -_- Argh ! Its thee only thing I have left of him. W/out it .. 0MG ! I feel like crying =,( I miss you Bub. Soooo much ! Dammit, where did I put that shirt ?! When I wear it I feel like he's not gone but with me. Now that its missing, I feel alone (when im really not - but you know what I mean). That shirt is special to me cus HE was special. SUPER SPECIAL to me! Gosh. I need to scan my room&tear it up .. .. again ! I HAVE T0 FIND THAT SHIRT ! =,,,( Where are youu ?! Its almost a year without you bub .. "a day w/out you is like a year w/out ... ... sunshine" (seriously, sun hasn't been shining when it SH0ULD be -_-) <3'yew&frigg'n miss yew ! :*

3 Months (almost) too long =(

Hello BEEL0G ! Yes, slap me for being inactive .. but i missed you ;) Anyways, nothing much happened the last couple months (my excuse for my short-term memory -_-) lol. But, something exciting that happened the last 3 weeks .. UTARR B0UND ! 3 Thursdays ago my girls (Mapa sisters, Mani, &Lose)&I drove out to Utah for the General Conference (my first time) super exciting ! I was super suprised my mama even let me go .. alone ! But, this is definately another trip to remember :) We were totally "in thurr like swimwear" ;) New memory was definately created ! Cali'swaggin, Hard'owt bro, Not you righ now, Not Betos .. its Ranchuuritos, Backstage action, My boys my boys they love me, You go go git it girl, Lets bring dis place downn, We from NZ bro .. (many more). Totally lovin it . First time in the General Conference room .. phew. I cant even explain how I felt when I entered that room full of people. Sure looked alot different from watchin it at home .. Too bad we only had one ticket for the Saturday afternoon session. lol. Atleast I got to see the prophet&his counselors :) Grateful to have the gospel in my life :) &I've finally witnessed anti-mormons outside the temple square. Damn protestors .. they make me wanna do missionary work (to them ofcourse). Anyways, Utah dances are pretty .. yeah, they're alrigh. We got mugged by every girl that passed by us ("If you ugly already, try smilin") - ps; N0'SWAGG lol. Fkofers. Finally met my twins BFFE on the Saturday night dance . Woohoo ! (Too bad his hot kiwi friend had a 11:00 curfew -_- haha .. is alroit, I have a 6:00 curfew back in Cali ! Woot ! lol) That same night it started snowing like crazy after the dance (one of those bipolar weather -_-) Sunday morning came and ofcourse, we still had no tickets for the sessions. lol. So we decided to just go to the tabernacle and watch the conf from there. Sadly, almost ALL the tongans was in there. LOL. Anyways, Utah was crackin ^.^ Too bad my girls had to drive back to Cali w/out me (iMissed them already), I stayed back w/ Peni for 2 more weeks. It was fun actually. Went w/ Inga to the gym daily (yes, I needed it . Due to guts&laziness). Drove around Utah (unexperienced - suprised I didnt get pulled over - phew !) and got to spend some time w/ my 801 babies :) Utah was just great =D *MarkIt <333 

              

*Cali'Swaggin. Holla Hollah ! ;) <333

Old to *New

Wow! Let me start off by saying .. HELLO BLOG WORLD! I missed you! I got loads to tell you .. well, sort of. That is if i even remember what ive been up too lately to not visit you for the longest -_- Hmm..lets start off from where I stopped shall we? (as in summerizin some things) lol. So, this year I was suppose to recieve my young women medalliane (spellcheck? lol), but since my parents took off to Tonga, I was to wait til next year for their return to recieve my necklace. I want my parents to be there on MY day(: Hmm, soo after they left the house was ..... wierd. Hmm, incomplete .. I missed them already. But they deserve this vacation --> STRESS FREE (: Christmas will be different without them here ): Anyways, my parents left to Tonga on the .. 18th. On the 22nd the youth had a xmas gift exchange. Before the whole gift exchangin (which will be that evening) I saw half of my youth at the mall buying their gifts! Lmbo! The activity was fun. My youth went to the widows of the wards homes for caroling (we hekka suck) but that was the fun part about it(: We head over to the chapel&got done with the whole gift exchangin than we played some glow in the dark dodgeball ^_^ It was fun. Oh yeah, on that same day, I bought all the kids at home presents with the money my dad gave me .. darn, i wanted to buy new clothes. Lol! But oh well, it was worth it because on Xmas day the kids loved their presents! (: Xmas day was same, gifts are opened, wrappers all over the place, kids playing with their new toys while we cook dinner for breakfast ^_^ Mmm. The rest of the day we just chilled(: On the 29th my twin came down and we finally kicked it ^_^ I missed this girl. Btw;she finally had her first bf on the 26th;) I would go deep in details but, thass for my journal;) But long date short .. they went to the Oakland temple, enjoyed the xmas lights,&he made it official! YAY!(: Im sooo proud of her ^_^ So we kicked it and went over to our last youth activity. It was a pretty good day(: Tonight everyone in the house was suppose to drive out to Oregon but my sister didnt want to go cus it was too cold out there. So I stayed with her. We did nothing but watch movies til new years. lol. So on New Years night I just wanted to sit at home on the couch&watch more movies til 12am! haha! But my twin encouraged me to get up&go to the stake dance we had goin on..plus my cousin called me to go with her. So I got ready and we were out the house after 9. The dance was hoot already bcus of the dj! Man, it was nightmare -_- The old folks was definately groovin, well ofcourse, it was their song! lol. Anyways, we just danced anyways so time can fly by. But at the dance, I saw the annoyingness, the wierdness, and went through lotta awkwardness! lol. 'Nuff said for the night. Countdown began, confettis went crazy, and many cheeks touched -_- I sat down .. no cheeks from strangers this year. haha! So .. HAPPY NEW YEAR! 2011 HAS FINALLY ARRIVED ^_^ Slept over at Lini's house til the next day came about(: Phew, that was a lotta writing on an itouch -__- My 2 thumbs hurt. WALLAHHH! Lets hope this year many posts will come about;) Interesting posts that is;) TEEHEE! <3