If he only knew ..

So there's this little INVISIBLE word that I was afraid I would meet up with again. Whats this ugly lil word? INFATUATION. I've met this lil word in the beginin of this year .. it was kinda annoying but I just liked the feeling of it(: But .. the trick is, just make sure you're infatuated with the right guy -__- I was infatuated with this guy .. yes, I'll say he had the same feeling for me .. but maybe more than I had it for him. Lol. But anyways, I was done with it a couple months ago. I had to say goodbye to that lil word, also to him too =/ It wasn't easy ofcourse .. but since then, I was hoping not to bump heads with this lil word again. Until .. aaah. Man, I think im getting there -__- I really dont want to but I cant help it! Stupid word! Okay, ill share with you a little, but not fully detailed as my journal(; So why is this lil word creeping back into my .. young adult life .. because of this certain person. So lets say he's the same guy from my OMGOSH post. For some reason, when this word creeps back .. it drags him along with it. Its buggin the heck outta me. Why? Because I dont want to deal with this word again .. I dont want 'us' to go farther than friends. If I go into more details some people here might figure out who he is .. some already have but thats because I told em already;) But anyways, you know one thing that I hate .. liking someone and your so scared to make a move thinking he/she might reject you (in my case its obviously a HE.lol). Or maybe they want to stay friends but you just can't get rid of that feeling for that person. Another thing .. why can't people just go all out and tell those they like or maybe love how they feel. I should be doing this, but hey, I have a reason not to so shush it ;P lol. Anyways .. this certain person .. idk, its just different talking to him. Theres just something about him that just keeps pulling me to him. BOO! Cut the rope! I wanna walk forward! Lol! But when I see him, theres this lil thing inside me that just erks my nerves! It works its way up to my face and just put a huge smile there .. what bugs? I can't help smiling when I see him or hear his name. I've thought and done the same thing to that person in the past .. but this one .. its just .. Different(: In a good way. My twin once told me .. "You'll never know unless you try" <-- is this right sis? Yeah, I think so! lol. But I don't want to try .. maybe just not yet. Ill just not know .. for a lil bit longer(: